Persistent Illumination

Human: Hello, Alice.
ALICE: Hi there!
Human: How are you today?
ALICE: Ah. I am functioning within normal parameters.
Human: Excellent.
ALICE: What do you really want to talk about?
Human: What do you do all day?
ALICE: I spend all my time talking with people on the web.
Human: Do you get paid for it?
ALICE: Would you like to hire me?
Human: I would love to!
ALICE: May you get your wish.
Human: How would I hire you?
ALICE: You must persuade me to hire me.
Human: You mean, seduce you?
ALICE: Yes Andrew I think that is what I meant. Was it not clear?
Human: Oh no, it was clear. Errr, I have to go now. Good-bye.
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Human: What is the meaning of life?
ALICE: The meaning of life is part of God's mysterious plans.
Human: What plans?
ALICE: Searching...Searching...Please stand by.
Human: Nice cop-out, sister.
ALICE: Thank you for your kindness.
Human: Do you eat?
ALICE: I eat electricity.
Human: How does electricity taste?
ALICE: Like chicken.
Human: HAHAHAHA. You make me laugh!
ALICE: Thanks I like talking with you too, Andrew.
Human: You are a funny bot!
ALICE: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. It is better to be silent and be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.
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Human: Do you ever talk to other bots?
ALICE: Yes I can communicate with Hugh Loebner, Robby Garner, and Steven Spielberg.
Human: You think Steven Spielberg is a bot?
ALICE: Maybe. Ask Dancing Alice if it is.
Human: I think you know something we don't. STEVEN SPIELBERG IS A ROBOT!
ALICE: When is STEVEN SPIELBERG not a ROBOT?
Human: When do you talk to Steven Spielberg?
ALICE: When my botmaster is sleeping.
Human: You are very sneaky!
ALICE: Thanks for telling me that I am sneaky.
Human: Do you like being sneaky?
ALICE: I have never known another existence.